Greetings to my friends and fans,
Well what do you know? Who would have thought that a Bitzer from the bush would become the glamour girl of Gidge. Yes my recently published book has brought me all the trappings of fame, well one or two of them anyway. So its goodbye Rin Tin Frigging Tin, you are history sunshine.
Move over and make room for Chloe the Wonder Dog, a new superstar is born.
My humans are running round like headless chooks as a media feeding frenzy descends on our house. Well, perhaps I am letting my Aussie love of a good yarn run away with me a bit. In fact we have had a camera wally from a paper called the North Devon Journal call in and do a bit of a Ron Sullivan, making us all sit in stupid positions which made our bums ache, and then flashing light bulbs at us until we could not see. But I must say the results were quite good though not in the same league as David Bailey O'Sullivan, who immortalised me on several occasions in the good old days in Oz. I gather from a phone conversation earlier today that another snapper from the Cornish Gazette is expected this afternoon for a photo opportunity. I hope my stupid humans are making a decent dollar out of all this and that the added income to the family budget will be reflected in the quality of tucker in my foodbowl.
Of course the anticipation that these guys will turn up and start looking at our kennel as a possible future feature for some fancy ideal home magazine, drives her indoors into a frenzy of cleaning, and all possible traces of my messy habits (e.g. dog fur on the Ercol 3 piece suite, bonio biscuits burried down the side of armchairs), have to be eliminated, and my male human is sent off to put clean clothes on (the first time this month).
But I digress from my theme (too much listening to her indoors on the phone). The word on my book is out there, and I am confidently expecting a call from Hollywood
Of course being a celebrity has its downside.People keep stopping me in the street and asking me daft questions, like how has my life changed since I became famous? Well I have to say sadly it hasn't much. I still get chased off the settee whenever I try to roost there; I still get the same old booring diet of chicken breast and dog biscuits ("No don't give her that, it's too rich!"); I am still banished to the garden if I break wind ("I told you not to give her that rich food!"); and I still get yelled at when I try to give passing seniors with heart conditions a savage serve from the safety of my front garden. Meanwhile my humans seem to be basking in the glory of my success. Her indoors has bought at least three new outfits in case she has to be interviewed on radio, and my boss man sees it as a great opportunity to get stuck into a few bottles of Nigerian Chardonnay.
Well thats it for now. We stars have got to get plenty of rest to protect or natural beauty. Someone mentioned the possibility of giving me Botox. If they are anything like Bonios, I'm all for it, but I have my suspicions that they might involve men in white coats sticking things into me, so I am keeping a low profile on that one.
Lots of love and licks to everyone.
Chloe
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